Dear Family & Friends,
It has been two weeks since Stella has passed away. Before she died, I asked her to send me signs that she was with me. I have already had so many signs that she is with me.
On Wednesday morning, I went into Holly's room to wake her for school. There was a piece of paper on the floor of her bedroom. It was folded. I assumed it was one of the many pictures Holly draws that had fallen off of her desk. I opened it and it was a picture of a heart that Stella had colored for Holly. Stella loved to color & had colored it for Holly a long time ago. I felt her presence at that very moment.
There were so many more of these signs all week. Our dear friend, Annie called me to tell me that she was going through some emails this week and came across an email from a Scrapbooking company. The name of their new product line was called, "Stella Rose". How crazy is that?! The same week I was thinking about getting back to my scrapbooks that I loved doing & thought of Annie and how she would be the perfect person to do this with. We couldn't believe that this was just a "coincidence".
I talk to Stella when I am alone in my car. I talk to her as if she is right there. Yesterday I was dusting my bedroom furniture and came across a card that Stella gave me a few months ago. The card says, "Sisters Carry Each Other in Their Hearts Forever and Always". I had to sit down and read it. I took the card and other trinkets that she gave me & arranged them on my dresser so that I could see them every day. I cried my eyes out. I needed a good cry.
The last few days have been very hard. Our friend was killed in a motorcycle accident and left a wife & four daughters. He was the first parent to come over & hug me & offer his condolences when I was at Andrea's softball game. I sat next to him at the game. Our daughters are very good friends. That afternoon he made me laugh. Two days later, a careless driver caused his motorcycle to go into a busy intersection, leaving him brain dead. I prayed & prayed for the next few days. I asked my Sister to please be there for him. I told her he was a special person with wonderful qualities and a good friend of ours. Today we will attend his wake & tomorrow we will attend his funeral. I can't believe another exceptional human being is gone. The only thing that gives me some comfort when someone wonderful passes away is the thought that God must think they are so special that he wants to get to know them better. My daughter Andrea's Religion teacher told her class this after one of her classmates was killed in an auto accident last year. When I was talking to Andrea before my last trip back to Long Island, she shared that with me. It stayed in my head and I have tried to "use" it as my reasoning for why God takes the "great ones".
Stella's wake & funeral are somewhat of a blur in my mind. I can remember specific conversations, but then I lose them. I remember looking around the room many times, thinking, "Stella was loved by so many people." I was grateful for all of the friends & family that came to support us and pay their respects to my Sister. I was standing close to her when all of the visitors came up to her casket. Many people shared a "story" about Stella with me. There had to be hundreds of people that came to her wake that day. Many people thanked me for writing this blog. I was touched by their kindness & was honored that many people told me that they felt so close to Stella through my writing. One of her very Spiritual friends, Claribel, told me that Stella had told her all about me when I went through cancer 9 years ago. Stella had asked this friend to pray for me. Claribel knew details about me that assured me that my sister considered this friend a confidant. I was blessed to hear her story.
Many childhood friends came to the Services. One friend just "happened" to be on Long Island visiting his family. He was Stella's friend from Elementary School. He came to the wake on his way to the airport. There are so many "back-stories" that came out during those two days. I learned so many things about my dear Sissy.
As the days go by, I am hearing from so many of you. One friend that I lost contact with, reached out to me through Facebook. We played together as kids & lived across the street from one another until she moved away. Lisa told me that my sister was an angel to her when we were children. She said that Stella showed her a special type of kindness. She believes that Stella reconnected us again. I believe this to be true.
I have compared this journey with my Sister to the chain we used to make at Christmas time out of construction paper. The different colored links represent all of the new connections I have made since I started writing this blog. The chain keeps getting longer & longer. As of today, almost 9,000 people have read my blog. People from Canada, Italy, Peru, South Korea, France, New Zealand, etc. have been following it. I am amazed at this!
For many of you that have told me that you were unable to leave a comment on the blog, I think I "fixed" the problem so that anyone can leave a comment, not just "Registered Followers".
I will sign off for now and try to write more in the coming week. I rescheduled all of my tests/scans for Tuesday & am asking if you can say a prayer for me that all goes well. Thank you all so much.
Love always, Grace
Sunday, February 20, 2011
Tuesday, February 15, 2011
Hundreds of Thank you's to send
HI again,
In the hours after Stella passed away, we started notifying people. We had put it on Facebook & I posted it on the blog. As strange as it seemed, it was the easiest way to communicate to the most people in the quickest manner. It was much harder having to call family & friends to tell them directly. The questions and explanations I had to give (over the phone) were especially hard for me. Having had an hour or so of sleep in the prior 2 days, I was really drained.
I already knew that Kathleen & Dominick have amazing friends, but in the next few days, their kindness was remarkable! They were right there offering to help, bringing us food, lending a hand. Breakfast arrived first from Dom's Assistant & dear, family friend, Antonella. In the next several days, more food, flowers, cards, calls & visits kept coming.
We have incredible family members as well, calling & asking what they could do.
First thing, Saturday morning, Jim, Dom, Joe, Rich & I went to the Branch Funeral Home. We had to finalize all of the arrangements. It was so difficult for me to make these kinds of decisions. I kept thinking it wasn't really happening. I kept thinking she was going to walk in and tell us she wasn't gone yet. I walked around the "casket room" feeling so overwhelmed. I walked away because it was just too much to bear. When they asked me my opinion, I tried to think about what Stella would want, but I couldn't focus. Thankfully, the boys all agreed on a specific one & I just said, "Okay."
The decision to have Stella buried with our parents was the perfect choice. She would not be alone. I felt a great deal of comfort in that.
John, the Funeral Director, was so understanding and listened to each one of our requests. He offered his own suggestions based on years of experience. After spending over 3 hours with John, every single detail was put together, exactly as Stella would have wanted it. We were all exhausted; emotionally drained. John, his brother Paul and their father, Henry made us feel like their family. They even had food delivered for us to take home. I could not believe they thought of that, too.
They never made us feel rushed and made every request we had fit into the service.
When we got back to Dom's, there were family members there. Our Cousins, Mino and Maria brought over tons of food, as did Tracy's sister, Joyce and her daughter, Adrienne. We had deliveries of fruit baskets from Natalie's parents, and many other friends sent food, flowers, and desserts, also.
As more & more people heard the news, the phone was ringing off the hook. Our cousins from Italy called & expressed their condolences. We started a notebook so we wouldn't forget all of the kindness that was bestowed on our family. I am hoping that there isn't a single person that "falls through the cracks" and doesn't receive a much appreciated "thank you". I pray that I can reach out to every single person who gave us comfort during this very difficult time.
For the next day and a half, we all walked around aimlessly. We tried to find things to do to pass the time. It was so hard not having Stella there with us. It was still so hard to believe this was reality. We comforted each other all day. When one of us was breaking down, there was always someone right there to hold onto. Thank you for reading this. I will write again soon.
Love, Grace
In the hours after Stella passed away, we started notifying people. We had put it on Facebook & I posted it on the blog. As strange as it seemed, it was the easiest way to communicate to the most people in the quickest manner. It was much harder having to call family & friends to tell them directly. The questions and explanations I had to give (over the phone) were especially hard for me. Having had an hour or so of sleep in the prior 2 days, I was really drained.
I already knew that Kathleen & Dominick have amazing friends, but in the next few days, their kindness was remarkable! They were right there offering to help, bringing us food, lending a hand. Breakfast arrived first from Dom's Assistant & dear, family friend, Antonella. In the next several days, more food, flowers, cards, calls & visits kept coming.
We have incredible family members as well, calling & asking what they could do.
First thing, Saturday morning, Jim, Dom, Joe, Rich & I went to the Branch Funeral Home. We had to finalize all of the arrangements. It was so difficult for me to make these kinds of decisions. I kept thinking it wasn't really happening. I kept thinking she was going to walk in and tell us she wasn't gone yet. I walked around the "casket room" feeling so overwhelmed. I walked away because it was just too much to bear. When they asked me my opinion, I tried to think about what Stella would want, but I couldn't focus. Thankfully, the boys all agreed on a specific one & I just said, "Okay."
The decision to have Stella buried with our parents was the perfect choice. She would not be alone. I felt a great deal of comfort in that.
John, the Funeral Director, was so understanding and listened to each one of our requests. He offered his own suggestions based on years of experience. After spending over 3 hours with John, every single detail was put together, exactly as Stella would have wanted it. We were all exhausted; emotionally drained. John, his brother Paul and their father, Henry made us feel like their family. They even had food delivered for us to take home. I could not believe they thought of that, too.
They never made us feel rushed and made every request we had fit into the service.
When we got back to Dom's, there were family members there. Our Cousins, Mino and Maria brought over tons of food, as did Tracy's sister, Joyce and her daughter, Adrienne. We had deliveries of fruit baskets from Natalie's parents, and many other friends sent food, flowers, and desserts, also.
As more & more people heard the news, the phone was ringing off the hook. Our cousins from Italy called & expressed their condolences. We started a notebook so we wouldn't forget all of the kindness that was bestowed on our family. I am hoping that there isn't a single person that "falls through the cracks" and doesn't receive a much appreciated "thank you". I pray that I can reach out to every single person who gave us comfort during this very difficult time.
For the next day and a half, we all walked around aimlessly. We tried to find things to do to pass the time. It was so hard not having Stella there with us. It was still so hard to believe this was reality. We comforted each other all day. When one of us was breaking down, there was always someone right there to hold onto. Thank you for reading this. I will write again soon.
Love, Grace
Saturday, February 12, 2011
Happy Birthday to my dear Sissy
Dear Family & Friends,
I haven't been able to write for days. I still can't believe that I can't just pick up the phone and call her. I have reached for my phone at least a dozen times already. I am still going over everything in my mind, wondering if there was something more I could have done for her.
Thursday, February 3rd was a very difficult day. Stella seemed so weak, but managed to get out of bed. She wanted to eat a little something, and we sat at the kitchen table while she ate. She received phone call after phone call that morning. I knew she was tired, but she took each call & even managed to put each caller at ease with her reassurance that she was getting better each day. I had to take the phone after the last call, as she was noticeably exhausted. I got up to clean the dishes and empty the dishwasher. She started coughing again. She vomited and then felt bad. I tried to reassure her that it was "no big deal". We have an expression that Kathleen & I use, "Better out than in!" She looked up at me and said she was sorry I had to clean it up. My poor sister was still worrying about me. I reminded her of all the times she cleaned up my puke when I was little. She smiled and I told her that it was my turn to take care of her.
I moved her to "her chair" in the family room. She was comfortable for a bit until the coughing started again. The coughing went on for hours & it was evident that her lungs were filled with fluid. That sound is ingrained in my head.
Kathleen & I knew that the end was closer than ever. We didn't see how she would be able to make it through the weekend. I sat with her all day and told her I loved her a thousand times. I prayed with her and made the sign of the cross with the Holy Water several times. I wanted her discomfort to be over. I was praying that she would be at peace.
Thursday night was even worse. She could barely walk and we moved her to the bathroom with the wheel chair. When we got her into bed, I honestly didn't think she was going to make it through the night. I prayed with her again and asked God to please take care of my Sissy.
She coughed all night. We held her & tried to make her more comfortable. It was breaking my heart and I cried and begged that she not suffer anymore.
At 4:45AM, it got even worse. She was struggling to breath. We were all at her side. Dominick told her he loved her & she responded, "I love you, too." Then I told her I loved her, and she said, "I love you." Those were the last words she said. We called her son and told him to come over. We called our brother, Jimmy but he couldn't get on an earlier flight. He wasn't going to get to Long Island until after 10PM.
We called Hospice and her nurse, Barbara came right over. Barbara used four words I will never forget. She said, "Stella is actively dying."
Rich, Kathleen, Dominick, Joe, Natalie & I were hysterically crying. We knew that this day was coming, but even still, you are never prepared. We never left her side. We each told her that it was okay to "let go."
At Noon, my nephew Danny arrived from JFK airport. He was away at college in North Carolina. He prayed that he would see her one last time. He asked his brother, Tommy to pray also. Danny was able to see his Godmother again. The Hospice nurse assured us that Stella was not in any pain. She said that this part was going to be harder for us to bear. She told us that she believed that Stella could hear us, and told us to keep talking to her.
The children & Kathleen's parents arrived as well. We were all surrounding her. We were all kissing her and telling her how much we loved her. I told her that our parents would be waiting for her. I asked her to please watch over all of us. I asked her to talk to me from Heaven. I prayed with her again and again. At approximately 4:40PM, Kathleen sat on the bed next to her. She held her hand and told Stella to "Let go." She then said, "Listen to Kathleen. Listen to Grace. We are all here."
I was kissing her forehead and telling her to let go & that we all loved her. Her breathing stopped at 4:45PM on February 4th.
The next few hours were surreal. A different Hospice nurse arrived who was very business-like. She was an asshole. Please pardon my French. She was more concerned about disposing the medications than she was about our feelings. Our dear Hospice nurse, Barbara, never knew that Stella had passed until much later that evening when Kathleen called her cell phone directly. She was so upset that her office did not call her first. The woman that came didn't have a relationship with us but could have been more comforting at that difficult time.
The Funeral Home we used was incredible. The Branch Funeral Home is a family run business. The owners, John & Paul came to take Stella that night. They were kind, and completely understood our grief. They didn't rush us and made us feel as if they truly cared about our family member & the job they had to do.
Unfortunately, Jimmy's plane was delayed over 2 hours and he did not arrive until almost 1AM. My siblings & I stayed up very late that night, just trying to give each other comfort.
My Sissy, Stella Rose would have celebrated her 52nd birthday today. She is in Heaven with our parents, I am certain. I will continue to write this blog to preserve my sister's memory and to keep a connection with so many of you that have become my friends because of it. There are so many things that I want to share with you. I want to write about the days leading up to the Wake & Funeral.
I want to thank everyone for their love & support. Our family is so grateful for the tremendous outpouring of kindness we received and are still receiving. I will write more soon.
Love always, Grace
I haven't been able to write for days. I still can't believe that I can't just pick up the phone and call her. I have reached for my phone at least a dozen times already. I am still going over everything in my mind, wondering if there was something more I could have done for her.
Thursday, February 3rd was a very difficult day. Stella seemed so weak, but managed to get out of bed. She wanted to eat a little something, and we sat at the kitchen table while she ate. She received phone call after phone call that morning. I knew she was tired, but she took each call & even managed to put each caller at ease with her reassurance that she was getting better each day. I had to take the phone after the last call, as she was noticeably exhausted. I got up to clean the dishes and empty the dishwasher. She started coughing again. She vomited and then felt bad. I tried to reassure her that it was "no big deal". We have an expression that Kathleen & I use, "Better out than in!" She looked up at me and said she was sorry I had to clean it up. My poor sister was still worrying about me. I reminded her of all the times she cleaned up my puke when I was little. She smiled and I told her that it was my turn to take care of her.
I moved her to "her chair" in the family room. She was comfortable for a bit until the coughing started again. The coughing went on for hours & it was evident that her lungs were filled with fluid. That sound is ingrained in my head.
Kathleen & I knew that the end was closer than ever. We didn't see how she would be able to make it through the weekend. I sat with her all day and told her I loved her a thousand times. I prayed with her and made the sign of the cross with the Holy Water several times. I wanted her discomfort to be over. I was praying that she would be at peace.
Thursday night was even worse. She could barely walk and we moved her to the bathroom with the wheel chair. When we got her into bed, I honestly didn't think she was going to make it through the night. I prayed with her again and asked God to please take care of my Sissy.
She coughed all night. We held her & tried to make her more comfortable. It was breaking my heart and I cried and begged that she not suffer anymore.
At 4:45AM, it got even worse. She was struggling to breath. We were all at her side. Dominick told her he loved her & she responded, "I love you, too." Then I told her I loved her, and she said, "I love you." Those were the last words she said. We called her son and told him to come over. We called our brother, Jimmy but he couldn't get on an earlier flight. He wasn't going to get to Long Island until after 10PM.
We called Hospice and her nurse, Barbara came right over. Barbara used four words I will never forget. She said, "Stella is actively dying."
Rich, Kathleen, Dominick, Joe, Natalie & I were hysterically crying. We knew that this day was coming, but even still, you are never prepared. We never left her side. We each told her that it was okay to "let go."
At Noon, my nephew Danny arrived from JFK airport. He was away at college in North Carolina. He prayed that he would see her one last time. He asked his brother, Tommy to pray also. Danny was able to see his Godmother again. The Hospice nurse assured us that Stella was not in any pain. She said that this part was going to be harder for us to bear. She told us that she believed that Stella could hear us, and told us to keep talking to her.
The children & Kathleen's parents arrived as well. We were all surrounding her. We were all kissing her and telling her how much we loved her. I told her that our parents would be waiting for her. I asked her to please watch over all of us. I asked her to talk to me from Heaven. I prayed with her again and again. At approximately 4:40PM, Kathleen sat on the bed next to her. She held her hand and told Stella to "Let go." She then said, "Listen to Kathleen. Listen to Grace. We are all here."
I was kissing her forehead and telling her to let go & that we all loved her. Her breathing stopped at 4:45PM on February 4th.
The next few hours were surreal. A different Hospice nurse arrived who was very business-like. She was an asshole. Please pardon my French. She was more concerned about disposing the medications than she was about our feelings. Our dear Hospice nurse, Barbara, never knew that Stella had passed until much later that evening when Kathleen called her cell phone directly. She was so upset that her office did not call her first. The woman that came didn't have a relationship with us but could have been more comforting at that difficult time.
The Funeral Home we used was incredible. The Branch Funeral Home is a family run business. The owners, John & Paul came to take Stella that night. They were kind, and completely understood our grief. They didn't rush us and made us feel as if they truly cared about our family member & the job they had to do.
Unfortunately, Jimmy's plane was delayed over 2 hours and he did not arrive until almost 1AM. My siblings & I stayed up very late that night, just trying to give each other comfort.
My Sissy, Stella Rose would have celebrated her 52nd birthday today. She is in Heaven with our parents, I am certain. I will continue to write this blog to preserve my sister's memory and to keep a connection with so many of you that have become my friends because of it. There are so many things that I want to share with you. I want to write about the days leading up to the Wake & Funeral.
I want to thank everyone for their love & support. Our family is so grateful for the tremendous outpouring of kindness we received and are still receiving. I will write more soon.
Love always, Grace
Sunday, February 6, 2011
Video Tribute to Stella
Dear Family & Friends,
The video tribute of my Sissy, Stella Ciocia-Seifried is complete.
Please go to:
www.branchfh.com
Click on the Obituaries
Click on Stella's name
Click on "Watch the Video Tribute"
Thank you all for your prayers & condolences.
Love, Grace
The video tribute of my Sissy, Stella Ciocia-Seifried is complete.
Please go to:
www.branchfh.com
Click on the Obituaries
Click on Stella's name
Click on "Watch the Video Tribute"
Thank you all for your prayers & condolences.
Love, Grace
Please pray for our Family
Dear Family, Friends & Blog Followers,
My heart has been broken in a million pieces. I have not slept in days. Our family is all coming together to plan this "event". Never in my wildest dreams did I imagine that I would be walking through a room full of caskets to put my sister in. I know that I have been mourning her for over four years, but it is still devastating to go through.
I have been down this exact road so many times already in my life. You would sort of think I would have it down pat. I learned valuable lessons from each loss. But this is still different. I had Stella here for so much more of my life. I know that is a blessing and I am grateful for every second we shared. I just don't know how I will be able to get through my days without hearing her voice. The same voice that I spoke to every single day of my life.
The joy & happiness she brought into our lives is immeasurable.
Our family has asked that in lieu of flowers, you may choose to make a donation in honor of Stella Ciocia-Seifried to the following charities she held dear to her heart. The first, is the Team I started 5 years ago, "Team Grace". We walk for Breast Cancer and my Sissy was on my team this year. She walked on a very chilly day in October, having just received the news that the cancer had spread to several of her organs.
To get to the website, cut & paste this link to your browser. It should guide you directly there.
http://main.acsevents.org/site/TR/MakingStridesAgainstBreastCancer/MSABCFY11Florida?px=2729995&pg=personal&fr_id=28020
The second organization is called "The Smile Train". Stella's Godson, Danny was born with a cleft lip. This charity raises money for surgical procedures for cleft palate/lip for families who are unable to afford this surgery worldwide. The medical complications associated with cleft lip & palate include the eye, ears & nose regions. Needless to say, the stigma of the physical disfiguration is tremendous.
If you prefer, You may choose to write a check to either of these charities in honor of Stella Ciocia-Seifried to:
"The American Cancer Society" or "The Smile Train" and mail your donation to my brother Dominick's office:
The address is:
Dominick Ciocia
c/o Gilman Ciocia
500 Portion Road
Suite 4
Lake Ronkonkoma, NY 11779
We will forward your donations to the organizations in her honor.
We will post photos to the blog & through the funeral home soon. Their website is www.branchfh.com.
Thank you so much for your kindness and support.
Love always, Grace
My heart has been broken in a million pieces. I have not slept in days. Our family is all coming together to plan this "event". Never in my wildest dreams did I imagine that I would be walking through a room full of caskets to put my sister in. I know that I have been mourning her for over four years, but it is still devastating to go through.
I have been down this exact road so many times already in my life. You would sort of think I would have it down pat. I learned valuable lessons from each loss. But this is still different. I had Stella here for so much more of my life. I know that is a blessing and I am grateful for every second we shared. I just don't know how I will be able to get through my days without hearing her voice. The same voice that I spoke to every single day of my life.
The joy & happiness she brought into our lives is immeasurable.
Our family has asked that in lieu of flowers, you may choose to make a donation in honor of Stella Ciocia-Seifried to the following charities she held dear to her heart. The first, is the Team I started 5 years ago, "Team Grace". We walk for Breast Cancer and my Sissy was on my team this year. She walked on a very chilly day in October, having just received the news that the cancer had spread to several of her organs.
To get to the website, cut & paste this link to your browser. It should guide you directly there.
http://main.acsevents.org/site/TR/MakingStridesAgainstBreastCancer/MSABCFY11Florida?px=2729995&pg=personal&fr_id=28020
The second organization is called "The Smile Train". Stella's Godson, Danny was born with a cleft lip. This charity raises money for surgical procedures for cleft palate/lip for families who are unable to afford this surgery worldwide. The medical complications associated with cleft lip & palate include the eye, ears & nose regions. Needless to say, the stigma of the physical disfiguration is tremendous.
If you prefer, You may choose to write a check to either of these charities in honor of Stella Ciocia-Seifried to:
"The American Cancer Society" or "The Smile Train" and mail your donation to my brother Dominick's office:
The address is:
Dominick Ciocia
c/o Gilman Ciocia
500 Portion Road
Suite 4
Lake Ronkonkoma, NY 11779
We will forward your donations to the organizations in her honor.
We will post photos to the blog & through the funeral home soon. Their website is www.branchfh.com.
Thank you so much for your kindness and support.
Love always, Grace
Friday, February 4, 2011
Stella is at peace
Dear Family & Friends,
Many of you already know this from my earlier Facebook post, but sadly, my dear Sissy, Stella Rose passed away this afternoon at approximately 4:45PM. She will always be in our hearts.
Many of you have followed my blog for several weeks now. I plan to keep writing about my Sister. Today was so difficult. I haven't slept in what seems like days. I am going to be heading to the airport in a few minutes to pick up my oldest brother, Jim, so I will write more tomorrow.
We have the main details of the Services. The Services for Stella will be held at "The Branch" Funeral Home, located at 190 E. Main Street, Smithtown NY on Monday from 2-4PM and then an evening visitation from 7-9PM. Her Funeral will be at St. Joseph's on Church St. in Kings Park on Tuesday morning. The website for the Funeral Home is : www.branchfh.com
We will have photos/info on the website soon.
Our Family would like to request that in lieu of flowers, you may choose to make a donation in Stella's name to either of the following organizations: The American Cancer Society "Making Strides Against Breast Cancer" (This is an organization that is very dear to our hearts. I have been a Team Leader for 5 years and Stella was on my Team. Please specify "Hillsborough County/Team Grace" on your donation.
The second option is called "The Smile Train." My nephew, Danny (Dom & Kathleen's son) was born with a cleft lip. He is Stella's Godson. Thank you so much.
I will have website links to these organizations in the next day or so.
Thank you all so much for your love and continued prayers.
Love always, Grace
Many of you have followed my blog for several weeks now. I plan to keep writing about my Sister. Today was so difficult. I haven't slept in what seems like days. I am going to be heading to the airport in a few minutes to pick up my oldest brother, Jim, so I will write more tomorrow.
We have the main details of the Services. The Services for Stella will be held at "The Branch" Funeral Home, located at 190 E. Main Street, Smithtown NY on Monday from 2-4PM and then an evening visitation from 7-9PM. Her Funeral will be at St. Joseph's on Church St. in Kings Park on Tuesday morning. The website for the Funeral Home is : www.branchfh.com
We will have photos/info on the website soon.
Our Family would like to request that in lieu of flowers, you may choose to make a donation in Stella's name to either of the following organizations: The American Cancer Society "Making Strides Against Breast Cancer" (This is an organization that is very dear to our hearts. I have been a Team Leader for 5 years and Stella was on my Team. Please specify "Hillsborough County/Team Grace" on your donation.
The second option is called "The Smile Train." My nephew, Danny (Dom & Kathleen's son) was born with a cleft lip. He is Stella's Godson. Thank you so much.
I will have website links to these organizations in the next day or so.
Thank you all so much for your love and continued prayers.
Love always, Grace
We are all by her side
Dear Family & Friends,
It has been difficult to sit and write today. Stella is near the end and we are praying for peace for her. We are surrounding her with love and prayers. Our nephew, Danny arrived home from college today. Our brother, Jim is scheduled to arrive this evening.
Please keep my whole family in your prayers. Thank you so much.
Love, Grace
It has been difficult to sit and write today. Stella is near the end and we are praying for peace for her. We are surrounding her with love and prayers. Our nephew, Danny arrived home from college today. Our brother, Jim is scheduled to arrive this evening.
Please keep my whole family in your prayers. Thank you so much.
Love, Grace
Thursday, February 3, 2011
Please pray for Stella
Dear Family & Friends,
My post tonight will be brief. I am sorry to say that things are very bad. The Hospice Nurse increased her pain medication to help Stella. I am praying that she is able to rest. We are all so worried about her. I want to spend every moment I can with her.
I will post again in the morning. Thank you all so much.
Love, Grace
My post tonight will be brief. I am sorry to say that things are very bad. The Hospice Nurse increased her pain medication to help Stella. I am praying that she is able to rest. We are all so worried about her. I want to spend every moment I can with her.
I will post again in the morning. Thank you all so much.
Love, Grace
Wednesday, February 2, 2011
Somewhere Over the Rainbow
Dear Family & Friends,
Last night Stella did not sleep well and this morning she was very tired. She didn't get out of bed until almost Noon. I sat beside her all morning and held her hand. Her voice is still raspy from all of the coughing. She told me that she thought she sounded like Lauren Bacall. Then she quoted her from one of her movies. She said, "You know how to whistle."
I grabbed my laptop & typed in the quote on You Tube. I played the movie clip for her and she was grinning and listening as she watched it so intently. I asked her to name another one of her favorite movies. (I already knew the answer). The Wizard of Oz is high on her list. I can remember watching it with her when we were children. She wanted to hear the Cowardly Lion in the "Shucks, I'm speechless!" scene from that movie. It was great to see how happy it made her.
Later in the afternoon, I clicked on "I Tunes" & played "Somewhere Over the Rainbow" for her. She loves that song. She listened and sang along with Judy Garland. Many of you may already know this fact: Stella has a beautiful singing voice. She always sings and knows just about every song. She instilled her love of music in her son. She inherited that gift from our dad.
Rich brought one of her dogs here today. She hasn't seen her dogs since December 27th. She was so happy to see Oscar. It was a very touching moment for all of us to witness.
Overall, the day was hard for Stella. She is getting so weak. Kathleen & I agreed that Stella looked very exhausted and it made us both worried.
I am going to focus on all of the wonderful moments we had today. Thank you so much for the love & prayers. We are all praying for a restful night for Stella.
Love, Grace
PS: Time now is 10:42PM. Goodnight.
Last night Stella did not sleep well and this morning she was very tired. She didn't get out of bed until almost Noon. I sat beside her all morning and held her hand. Her voice is still raspy from all of the coughing. She told me that she thought she sounded like Lauren Bacall. Then she quoted her from one of her movies. She said, "You know how to whistle."
I grabbed my laptop & typed in the quote on You Tube. I played the movie clip for her and she was grinning and listening as she watched it so intently. I asked her to name another one of her favorite movies. (I already knew the answer). The Wizard of Oz is high on her list. I can remember watching it with her when we were children. She wanted to hear the Cowardly Lion in the "Shucks, I'm speechless!" scene from that movie. It was great to see how happy it made her.
Later in the afternoon, I clicked on "I Tunes" & played "Somewhere Over the Rainbow" for her. She loves that song. She listened and sang along with Judy Garland. Many of you may already know this fact: Stella has a beautiful singing voice. She always sings and knows just about every song. She instilled her love of music in her son. She inherited that gift from our dad.
Rich brought one of her dogs here today. She hasn't seen her dogs since December 27th. She was so happy to see Oscar. It was a very touching moment for all of us to witness.
Overall, the day was hard for Stella. She is getting so weak. Kathleen & I agreed that Stella looked very exhausted and it made us both worried.
I am going to focus on all of the wonderful moments we had today. Thank you so much for the love & prayers. We are all praying for a restful night for Stella.
Love, Grace
PS: Time now is 10:42PM. Goodnight.
Tuesday, February 1, 2011
Tuesday was a much better day for Stella!
Dear Family & Friends,
Last night Stella had another difficult night. She was coughing almost the whole night. This morning, however, she seemed so much better. The coughing was not so bad and she ate a little bit.
There were so many good moments today. Seeing Stella with each one of the children is always wonderful to watch. She has a unique bond with each one of them. Dominick & Kathleen have created the most perfect atmosphere here, in their home, for Stella. She is surrounded with love every moment of every day.
She received a very special phone call after dinner. Her son plays poker and was recently a contestant on "PokerStars Million Dollar Challenge". He was playing the game to raise money for my sister. He was hoping to raise enough money for more clinical trials. Although he did not win, we were able to travel together & watch him play in Las Vegas this past July. Stella was able to see her son play in a National Tournament that was aired on television. She was part of the show, sitting in the front row, cheering him on. Her privacy about her illness was out there for everyone to hear about. Tonight, the star of the show, Professional Poker Player, Daniel Negreanu, called my sister to tell her he was thinking about her and talked with her for several minutes. He made my sister grin from ear to ear as he praised her son. It was so special to her.
Then, a little later on this evening, we were able to connect my house to Dom's house via a web cam. It was so wonderful for my family to see "Aunt Nelly" and tell her how much they love & miss her. My daughter, Andrea was especially worried when we spoke later. She told me that she didn't realize how much weight Stella had lost. She asked me if I could ask my sister to sing the "I love Aunt Nelly" song to her? All of the nieces & nephews have heard Stella sing this song to them. She wanted to remember each line & write it down. Stella sang it to her (as best she could) with her "hoarse" voice. My heart was breaking seeing my daughter cry.
The Hospice Nurse recommended an albuterol treatment (a breathing treatment) to help her breath easier. Hopefully, tonight will be better for her. It is almost 11PM and she is still sitting up in the chair in the family room.
**I just returned to my computer. It's now 12:20AM. I had to stop typing earlier because Stella was ready to go to bed. Kathleen & I helped Rich get her settled into bed. I could tell she was exhausted.
We said our prayers & I made the Sign of the Cross on her forehead, lips & chest again. She held onto her Rosary Beads and I said, (aloud) "God, please help Stella have a good night's rest and please don't let her feel any pain." Then I asked God for a miracle. Stella heard me and she said, "I already have a miracle...you, Rich & Kathleen--are all here with me now."
Thank you so much for the beautiful messages. I am so deeply touched by the outpouring of support for our family.
Now, I am going to try to get a little sleep.
Love, Grace
PS: It is now 12:53AM. Goodnight to everyone.
Last night Stella had another difficult night. She was coughing almost the whole night. This morning, however, she seemed so much better. The coughing was not so bad and she ate a little bit.
There were so many good moments today. Seeing Stella with each one of the children is always wonderful to watch. She has a unique bond with each one of them. Dominick & Kathleen have created the most perfect atmosphere here, in their home, for Stella. She is surrounded with love every moment of every day.
She received a very special phone call after dinner. Her son plays poker and was recently a contestant on "PokerStars Million Dollar Challenge". He was playing the game to raise money for my sister. He was hoping to raise enough money for more clinical trials. Although he did not win, we were able to travel together & watch him play in Las Vegas this past July. Stella was able to see her son play in a National Tournament that was aired on television. She was part of the show, sitting in the front row, cheering him on. Her privacy about her illness was out there for everyone to hear about. Tonight, the star of the show, Professional Poker Player, Daniel Negreanu, called my sister to tell her he was thinking about her and talked with her for several minutes. He made my sister grin from ear to ear as he praised her son. It was so special to her.
Then, a little later on this evening, we were able to connect my house to Dom's house via a web cam. It was so wonderful for my family to see "Aunt Nelly" and tell her how much they love & miss her. My daughter, Andrea was especially worried when we spoke later. She told me that she didn't realize how much weight Stella had lost. She asked me if I could ask my sister to sing the "I love Aunt Nelly" song to her? All of the nieces & nephews have heard Stella sing this song to them. She wanted to remember each line & write it down. Stella sang it to her (as best she could) with her "hoarse" voice. My heart was breaking seeing my daughter cry.
The Hospice Nurse recommended an albuterol treatment (a breathing treatment) to help her breath easier. Hopefully, tonight will be better for her. It is almost 11PM and she is still sitting up in the chair in the family room.
**I just returned to my computer. It's now 12:20AM. I had to stop typing earlier because Stella was ready to go to bed. Kathleen & I helped Rich get her settled into bed. I could tell she was exhausted.
We said our prayers & I made the Sign of the Cross on her forehead, lips & chest again. She held onto her Rosary Beads and I said, (aloud) "God, please help Stella have a good night's rest and please don't let her feel any pain." Then I asked God for a miracle. Stella heard me and she said, "I already have a miracle...you, Rich & Kathleen--are all here with me now."
Thank you so much for the beautiful messages. I am so deeply touched by the outpouring of support for our family.
Now, I am going to try to get a little sleep.
Love, Grace
PS: It is now 12:53AM. Goodnight to everyone.
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