She is with us

Dear Family & Friends,
It has been two weeks since Stella has passed away. Before she died, I asked her to send me signs that she was with me. I have already had so many signs that she is with me.
On Wednesday morning, I went into Holly's room to wake her for school. There was a piece of paper on the floor of her bedroom. It was folded. I assumed it was one of the many pictures Holly draws that had fallen off of her desk. I opened it and it was a picture of a heart that Stella had colored for Holly. Stella loved to color & had colored it for Holly a long time ago. I felt her presence at that very moment.
There were so many more of these signs all week. Our dear friend, Annie called me to tell me that she was going through some emails this week and came across an email from a Scrapbooking company. The name of their new product line was called, "Stella Rose".  How crazy is that?! The same week I was thinking about getting back to my scrapbooks that I loved doing & thought of Annie and how she would be the perfect person to do this with. We couldn't believe that this was just a "coincidence".
I talk to Stella when I am alone in my car. I talk to her as if she is right there. Yesterday I was dusting my bedroom furniture and came across a card that Stella gave me a few months ago. The card says, "Sisters Carry Each Other in Their Hearts Forever and Always". I had to sit down and read it. I took the card and other trinkets that she gave me & arranged them on my dresser so that I could see them every day. I cried my eyes out. I needed a good cry.
The last few days have been very hard.  Our friend was killed in a motorcycle accident and left a wife & four daughters. He was the first parent to come over & hug me & offer his condolences when I was at Andrea's softball game.  I sat next to him at the game. Our daughters are very good friends. That afternoon he made me laugh. Two days later, a careless driver caused his motorcycle to go into a busy intersection, leaving him brain dead. I prayed & prayed for the next few days. I asked my Sister to please be there for him. I told her he was a special person with wonderful qualities and a good friend of ours. Today we will attend his wake & tomorrow we will attend his funeral. I can't believe another exceptional human being is gone. The only thing that gives me some comfort when someone wonderful passes away is the thought that God must think they are so special that he wants to get to know them better.  My daughter Andrea's Religion teacher told her class this after one of her classmates was killed in an auto accident last year. When I was talking to Andrea before my last trip back to Long Island, she shared that with me. It stayed in my head and I have tried to "use" it as my reasoning for why God takes the "great ones".
Stella's wake & funeral are somewhat of a blur in my mind.  I can remember specific conversations, but then I lose them. I remember looking around the room many times, thinking, "Stella was loved by so many people."  I was grateful for all of the friends & family that came to support us and pay their respects to my Sister. I was standing close to her when all of the visitors came up to her casket. Many people shared a "story" about Stella with me. There had to be hundreds of people that came to her wake that day. Many people thanked me for writing this blog. I was touched by their kindness & was honored that many people told me that they felt so close to Stella through my writing. One of her very Spiritual friends, Claribel, told me that Stella had told her all about me when I went through cancer 9 years ago. Stella had asked this friend to pray for me. Claribel knew details about me that assured me that my sister considered this friend a confidant. I was blessed to hear her story.
Many childhood friends came to the Services. One friend just "happened" to be on Long Island visiting his family. He was Stella's friend from Elementary School. He came to the wake on his way to the airport. There are so many "back-stories" that came out during those two days. I learned so many things about my dear Sissy.
As the days go by, I am hearing from so many of you. One friend that I lost contact with, reached out to me through Facebook. We played together as kids & lived across the street from one another until she moved away. Lisa told me that my sister was an angel to her when we were children. She said that Stella showed her a special type of kindness. She believes that Stella reconnected us again. I believe this to be true.
I have compared this journey with my Sister to the chain we used to make at Christmas time out of construction paper. The different colored links represent all of the new connections I have made since I started writing this blog. The chain keeps getting longer & longer. As of today, almost 9,000 people have read my blog. People from Canada, Italy, Peru, South Korea, France, New Zealand, etc. have been following it. I am amazed at this!
For many of you that have told me that you were unable to leave a comment on the blog, I think I "fixed" the problem so that anyone can leave a comment, not just "Registered Followers".
I will sign off for now and try to write more in the coming week. I rescheduled all of my tests/scans for Tuesday & am asking if you can say a prayer for me that all goes well. Thank you all so much.
Love always, Grace